In this highly-networked, fast-paced business environment with weekly business networking meetings and social media posts bombarding our senses 24/7… how can an entrepreneur effectively connect with a mentor, one that can add substantive value to his or her business?

Take them to lunch!

What is a mentor?

Loosely defined the modern mentor is a trusted friend, counselor or teacher; usually someone with more knowledge, skill or experience than yourself.

In business this can either be someone with a lot of general business experience, one who has simply been around the block a few times, you know… been there, done that. Or it can be someone with a specific set of skills / knowledge, like business finance or how to set up Facebook fan page or even how to transplant a camellia bush.

Personally, a mentor is any person who I feel is successful in their field that may have some helpful information to help move me along my path or avoid pitfalls. A mentor that can help with the latter is golden. For me, that person is a 90-year-old, World War II fighter pilot and business friend named Cat. He is the only person I know that has been following and investing in the stock and precious metal markets for over 65 years. He has owned and operated several businesses, and can still make a small fortune in silver due to his very personal understanding of long-term trends.

Where business networking falls short

Business network groups seem to be synonymous with sales and sometimes a bit of education, but rarely active mentoring. Taking a mentor to lunch is not about networking, it is about leveraging the knowledge that is in someone else’s brain. If you want to find a mentor you must seek them out and with the proper perspective, you can find mentors in the business networking arena.

I sometimes hear small business owners complain that chambers of commerce do not work. The chamber model does work if you understand how to take advantage of the resources provided. A chamber of commerce is an advocate for local businesses, however it is not in their mission to feed you customers, nor do they turn you into a business magnet. One thing that chambers do provide is the opportunity to interact with other business owners and chamber leadership. You must take it upon yourself to engage one-on-one; both groups contain potential mentors.

In my case, in addition to being a Chamber member, I joined Business Network International (BNI) as well as a local business leadership group. With business success I outgrew BNI, however the main thing I took away from my experience was that the real action occurs when you meet with a person outside of the weekly meetings, at lunch, over coffee, at the park, etc. BNI calls these one-on-one meetings a Dance Card. I once had a dance card meeting with a fellow business person while donating blood. Our schedules were very hard to match, so since I already had the appointment, we met at the blood bank and donated side-by-side so we could talk during the blood letting. What can I say, I was able to leverage my time and donate for a good cause.

TIP – To make any business networking group effective, get to know persons of interest in the group by meeting them 1-on-1; you never know, you might even find a mentor.

Why lunch?

Many times the mentor who has the skill, knowledge or experience that you are hoping to glean is a very busy person. You must be respectful of their time. This leads to several reason why lunch is a good to way meet with a mentor:

• Food – almost everybody eats lunch, even busy people
• Free – everybody like a free lunch
• Time – lunch limits the meeting to about an hour; the mentor can feel comfortable knowing that this will not be a huge time investment
• Safety – a lunch setting is public and safe
• Equalizer – sitting across from someone at a lunch table is a neutral power position as opposed to the mentor sitting behind a desk
• Distractions – a lunch setting removes both the mentor and mentee from work distractions
• Cost Effective – lunch for two is many times less expensive than dinner or drinks
• Psychological – you paid for lunch, they kinda owe you

It should be noted that even if your mentor doesn’t eat lunch, they typically will take a break during that time to workout, go for a jog or a take bike ride, etc. That said, before you try to keep up, consult with your physician before you start an exercise program.

How to meet a mentor?

I am a firm believer that you bring the teacher to you when you are open and ready to learn; whether that teacher be a page in a book or a live person. I have already touched on business networking groups, however there are so many more opportunities to meet potential mentors. Places to find business mentors include:

Business networks

• Colleagues
• Senior management
• Educational seminars (e.g. Brown Bag Lunches)
• Trade association events
• Conventions / Conferences
• Small Business Development Centers (SBDC)
• Service Corps of Retired Executives (SCORE)
• Business training presentations (free or paid)

TIP – If you are at an presentation-type event, the speaker may not be the mentor for you… it may be the person sitting right next to you.

What if the prospective mentor says “no”?

OK, this is the normal dating fear. But to be honest with you, I have never been turned down by a potential mentor when I ask them to meet over lunch and tell them why. The “why” is important, they need to know that you value their knowledge/experience and that you would like to learn from it. Many times the mentor candidate will be very honored that you value their tenure and be happy to meet with you.